Below is a lin to a recent interview I did with SiliconRepublic.com on why a CIO’s role must be about selling the value of IT to senior management.
http://www.siliconrepublic.com/strategy/item/19626-interview-from-cio-to-sale/
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Emotional Intelligence in Sport? Part 2
In the last few weeks I have been hearing or reading about a change in top class sports coaching. A change that reflects a much greater degree of emotional intelligence in the world of male macho sports.
I previously shared the example of Pat Gilroy from the parochial world of Gaelic football (see my previous blog).
Example number 2 is from another tough physical sport and this person has the most pressurised job in that particular sport.
Here are some of his quotes from a recent interview with the Irish Times;
“You couldn’t coach the way you did in the 1990s now. They (the players) would not put up with it."
"Really I am the vision man, the strategic person."
"When I coached…..10-15 years ago I was much more authoritarian, but that is how they (the players) grew up, that’s how they were taught at school."
"Today it’s much more consensus management, with people helping each other. So if you are too dictatorial, you just wouldn’t last.”
The speaker is Graham Henry, the coach of the New Zealand (All Black’s) Rugby team.
If you think you have pressure and tough targets, Henry carries not the hopes of a nation but the expectation that New Zealand will win the next Rugby World Cup.
How many of your leaders would you describe as “the vision man”? How many drive consensus and engagement as opposed to dictating everything?
Sport, which can be such a macho, results driven environment involving all ranges of intelligence, is showing the way on leadership – as a business leader are you paying attention?
I previously shared the example of Pat Gilroy from the parochial world of Gaelic football (see my previous blog).
Example number 2 is from another tough physical sport and this person has the most pressurised job in that particular sport.
Here are some of his quotes from a recent interview with the Irish Times;
“You couldn’t coach the way you did in the 1990s now. They (the players) would not put up with it."
"Really I am the vision man, the strategic person."
"When I coached…..10-15 years ago I was much more authoritarian, but that is how they (the players) grew up, that’s how they were taught at school."
"Today it’s much more consensus management, with people helping each other. So if you are too dictatorial, you just wouldn’t last.”
The speaker is Graham Henry, the coach of the New Zealand (All Black’s) Rugby team.
If you think you have pressure and tough targets, Henry carries not the hopes of a nation but the expectation that New Zealand will win the next Rugby World Cup.
How many of your leaders would you describe as “the vision man”? How many drive consensus and engagement as opposed to dictating everything?
Sport, which can be such a macho, results driven environment involving all ranges of intelligence, is showing the way on leadership – as a business leader are you paying attention?
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Emotional Intelligence in Sport? What Business Leaders Can Learn – Part 1
Have always been weary of referencing sport too much in my work with clients as it can be a turn off for those not interested and also because sport is often to simplistic a metaphor for business (if only business had such defined parameters of time, skill, achievement and success).
However I am going to break my own rule because recently I had the experience of listening to a sports coach that have made me realized that sport could be leading the way in Emotionally Intelligent leadership.
Let us just define Emotional Intelligence briefly with one of my favorite quotes which says Emotional Intelligence is “everything you do that isn’t a result of how smart you are” (Martyn Newman).
Pat Gilroy manages the Dublin Gaelic Football team. Gaelic football is indigenous to Ireland (think soccer/rugby/barroom fighting) and is a tough male macho sport – the traditional culture has been of authoritative, telling, “do as I say” , boot and bite leadership.
As the capital, the Dublin team gets 80,000 people cheering them on at games while 3.5 million from the rest of the country are wishing them continued failure. Pat’s job is therefore very high profile, especially since Dublin has underachieved for the last 10 years.
Pat took on the role of turning Dublin around last year and here are some of the things he mentioned when talking to myself and thirty other leaders last month:
- His focus is on ENGAGEMENT (of a panel of 30 top class players) and he has gotten there with his players through VISION, DISCIPLINE and INVOLVEMENT.
- He defines leadership as “creating the CULTURE for THE TEAM to be successful”
- He has focused on doing more “TEAM ASKS” than “TEAM TALKS”
- When results have not gone well he has owned up to his OWN MISTAKES as a way to ensure everyone gets DIRECT FEEDBACK.
No macho stuff, no “I’m the expert”. Pat is leading by connecting to his team and engaging them. He is building a winning culture as opposed to fixating on a winning the cup – he see’s that the success comes after the culture.
So can you take even one of the bullet points above and start doing more of it with your team?
None of them require you to have a big IQ – they all require you though to park your own ego and to ENGAGE with your team as adults who want to be involved, who have good ideas and who can be accountable and responsibility for their own actions.
By the way, Pat’s team got to the semi-final of the championship this summer and missed out on the final by a single score.
However I am going to break my own rule because recently I had the experience of listening to a sports coach that have made me realized that sport could be leading the way in Emotionally Intelligent leadership.
Let us just define Emotional Intelligence briefly with one of my favorite quotes which says Emotional Intelligence is “everything you do that isn’t a result of how smart you are” (Martyn Newman).
Pat Gilroy manages the Dublin Gaelic Football team. Gaelic football is indigenous to Ireland (think soccer/rugby/barroom fighting) and is a tough male macho sport – the traditional culture has been of authoritative, telling, “do as I say” , boot and bite leadership.
As the capital, the Dublin team gets 80,000 people cheering them on at games while 3.5 million from the rest of the country are wishing them continued failure. Pat’s job is therefore very high profile, especially since Dublin has underachieved for the last 10 years.
Pat took on the role of turning Dublin around last year and here are some of the things he mentioned when talking to myself and thirty other leaders last month:
- His focus is on ENGAGEMENT (of a panel of 30 top class players) and he has gotten there with his players through VISION, DISCIPLINE and INVOLVEMENT.
- He defines leadership as “creating the CULTURE for THE TEAM to be successful”
- He has focused on doing more “TEAM ASKS” than “TEAM TALKS”
- When results have not gone well he has owned up to his OWN MISTAKES as a way to ensure everyone gets DIRECT FEEDBACK.
No macho stuff, no “I’m the expert”. Pat is leading by connecting to his team and engaging them. He is building a winning culture as opposed to fixating on a winning the cup – he see’s that the success comes after the culture.
So can you take even one of the bullet points above and start doing more of it with your team?
None of them require you to have a big IQ – they all require you though to park your own ego and to ENGAGE with your team as adults who want to be involved, who have good ideas and who can be accountable and responsibility for their own actions.
By the way, Pat’s team got to the semi-final of the championship this summer and missed out on the final by a single score.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Managing is Child's Play
Am currently dipping in and out of a book by a child psychologist (David Coleman) called “Parenting is Child’s Play” and it got me thinking about how some of his suggestions could also apply to managing a team.
Am sure that we can all agree that both parenting and managing are anything but easy and we have all experienced, on one side or the other, how both can go horribly wrong.
But here are a few tips from the parenting book that can help any manager.
Communication:
My big takeaway, as a new dad, is the emphasis on getting down to the child’s eye line and communicating instructions or discipline face to face but also on the same eye level. Barking instructions from five feet about the child will be scary while shouting at them from the kitchen as the kid is doing something in other room is not going to work either (other than get us more frazzled as they don’t pay attention). Neither creates the connection of eye to eye contact
So I believe it goes with reports – key instructions need to be done face to face, eye to eye so that both parties are paying attention and getting the message. Email or voicemail are fine for follow up but do the initial conversation eye to eye. Remember, over 90% of communication is through our tone and gestures.
What if your report is remote? You need to still make that effort to deliver the really key messages face to face – there is no substitute.
The “getting to their eye level” is definitely working for me as a dad – how can you make it happen more for you and your reports?
Discipline:
The parenting book is teaching me lots about discipline. Am trying to move from a raging shouter dad to a measured and in control dad (trying!). What I am learning is;
- Make direct eye to eye contact – see above
- Give a warning – “if you do ……then….” – it helps me get the thing off my chest and gives the child a chance to react
- Explain why they are being disciplined – make it clear that “because you did ….. I am now doing …..”
- When the discipline is over, its over – a biggy for me – after the punishment I am learning to tell my boys that I love them and we hug. Now am not suggesting this for your reports but I do believe you should make clear that when the issue is over, it’s over and no grudge will be held – it’s time for closure and to move on.
In work, are you able to provide tough feedback and then move on?
Don’t pay too much attention to the bold child:
With three young boys, diner/lunch/breakfast can all be a challenge and there is a high chance that one of them is up to something. I can get so immersed in dealing with the naughty one that he ends up getting all my attention. One can see the other two thinking “ah! So if I do this, daddy will talk to me too”.
In work, how often do you find your time and energy focused on the low or problem performer? Are you ensuring the good performers are also getting your time or are you sending a message of “you only get my attention when you do something wrong?”
Managing and parenting are both tough but they also provide some of the best and proudest moments you can have.
The above tips are making me think more cleverly as a dad and hence helping me and the boys enjoy are time together more.
Could they help do the same for you and your reports?
Colm
Am sure that we can all agree that both parenting and managing are anything but easy and we have all experienced, on one side or the other, how both can go horribly wrong.
But here are a few tips from the parenting book that can help any manager.
Communication:
My big takeaway, as a new dad, is the emphasis on getting down to the child’s eye line and communicating instructions or discipline face to face but also on the same eye level. Barking instructions from five feet about the child will be scary while shouting at them from the kitchen as the kid is doing something in other room is not going to work either (other than get us more frazzled as they don’t pay attention). Neither creates the connection of eye to eye contact
So I believe it goes with reports – key instructions need to be done face to face, eye to eye so that both parties are paying attention and getting the message. Email or voicemail are fine for follow up but do the initial conversation eye to eye. Remember, over 90% of communication is through our tone and gestures.
What if your report is remote? You need to still make that effort to deliver the really key messages face to face – there is no substitute.
The “getting to their eye level” is definitely working for me as a dad – how can you make it happen more for you and your reports?
Discipline:
The parenting book is teaching me lots about discipline. Am trying to move from a raging shouter dad to a measured and in control dad (trying!). What I am learning is;
- Make direct eye to eye contact – see above
- Give a warning – “if you do ……then….” – it helps me get the thing off my chest and gives the child a chance to react
- Explain why they are being disciplined – make it clear that “because you did ….. I am now doing …..”
- When the discipline is over, its over – a biggy for me – after the punishment I am learning to tell my boys that I love them and we hug. Now am not suggesting this for your reports but I do believe you should make clear that when the issue is over, it’s over and no grudge will be held – it’s time for closure and to move on.
In work, are you able to provide tough feedback and then move on?
Don’t pay too much attention to the bold child:
With three young boys, diner/lunch/breakfast can all be a challenge and there is a high chance that one of them is up to something. I can get so immersed in dealing with the naughty one that he ends up getting all my attention. One can see the other two thinking “ah! So if I do this, daddy will talk to me too”.
In work, how often do you find your time and energy focused on the low or problem performer? Are you ensuring the good performers are also getting your time or are you sending a message of “you only get my attention when you do something wrong?”
Managing and parenting are both tough but they also provide some of the best and proudest moments you can have.
The above tips are making me think more cleverly as a dad and hence helping me and the boys enjoy are time together more.
Could they help do the same for you and your reports?
Colm
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Try on some Faulty Thinking today - free trial
Read the following:
1. I see a Tiger
2. I think I’m in danger
3. I feel afraid
4. I run.
Consider this - statement 3 (and 4) is actually derived from statement 2, not from statement 1 as many would initially believe.
They way you feel does not come from your surroundings or even your direct perceptions. It comes from your thinking.
Epictitus said “Man is not disturbed by events, but by the view he takes of them”
As a leader, your thinking can be an enabler or an inhibitor to your success and to the success of your team and organisation.
So how about trying on a few faulty thinking styles to see which ones you tend to, unconsciously, use most? See the list below!
Personally, I seem to like a mix of #4 Mind Reading and #6 Personalisation – and of course they bring out the worst in me (anger, hurt, avoidance, withdrawal). All derailers to me being impactful and effective (not to mention to being fun to be around)
But here is the cool bit – by naming my faulty thinking I make them conscious and therefore I now have the ability to choose to use them or not!
What about you? Do you recognise yourself in any of the 15 styles below? Do you also recognise the often ineffective consequences of these styles in terms of your behaviour and feelings?
Styles of Faulty Thinking
1.Filtering: you take the negative and magnify them while filtering out all of the positives
2. Polarized Thinking: Things are black or white, good or bad. You have to be perfect or you’re a failure. There is no middle ground. Things are either awful or terrific. Useful for judging self or others.
3. Overgeneralization: You come to a general conclusion based on a single incident or piece of evidence. If some bad happens one, you expect it to happen over and over again. If someone lets you down once, you assume they are incompetent or can never be trusted.
4. Mind Reading: Without their saying so, you know what people are feeling and why they act the way they do, especially in terms of how they feel towards you.
5. Catastrophising: You expect disaster. You notice or head something about a problem and you assume the worst possible outcomes.
6. Personalization: You think that everything that people do or say is some kind of reaction to you. You constantly compare yourself to others.
7.Control Fallacy: If you feel externally controlled, you see yourself as a totally helpless victim of fate. You don’t believe that you can influence the important outcomes. Or conversely, you feel excessively responsible. Everything depends on you, and if things don’t go well, it is all your fault. You feel responsible for the pain and happiness of those around you. This is a huge burden.
8. Fallacy of Fairness: Fairness is a big standard. You feel resentful because you think you know what’s fair, but other people won’t agree with you. When things go wrong, you are liable to say “That’s not fair. Its just not fair”
9.Emotional Reasoning: You believe that what you feel must be true…automaticlally. If you feel stupid and boring then you MUST BE stupid and boring.
10. Fallacy of Change: You expect other people will change to suit you if you just pressure or cajole them enough. Some of your relationships are based on the premise that you can change the other person.
11. Global Labelling: You generalise one or two qualities into a negative global judgement. If you have one bad interaction with someone in a department, you will tell others that that whole department is full of idiots.
12. Blaming: You hold other people responsible for your pain or conversely, blame yourself for every problem.
13.Shoulds: You have a list of ironclad rules about how you and other people SHOULD act. People who break these rules make you angry and you feel guilty if you violate those rules. Your SHOULDS are perfectionist.
14. Being Right: You are continually on trial to prove that your opinions and actions are correct. Being wrong is unthinkable and this makes you defensive.
15. Heaven’s Reward Fallacy: You expect all your sacrifice and self denial to pay off, as if there is someone keeping score. You feel bitter when your reward does not come . Often it doesn’t and this upsets you.
(sourced from Bruce Peltier “The Psychology of Executive Coaching”)
1. I see a Tiger
2. I think I’m in danger
3. I feel afraid
4. I run.
Consider this - statement 3 (and 4) is actually derived from statement 2, not from statement 1 as many would initially believe.
They way you feel does not come from your surroundings or even your direct perceptions. It comes from your thinking.
Epictitus said “Man is not disturbed by events, but by the view he takes of them”
As a leader, your thinking can be an enabler or an inhibitor to your success and to the success of your team and organisation.
So how about trying on a few faulty thinking styles to see which ones you tend to, unconsciously, use most? See the list below!
Personally, I seem to like a mix of #4 Mind Reading and #6 Personalisation – and of course they bring out the worst in me (anger, hurt, avoidance, withdrawal). All derailers to me being impactful and effective (not to mention to being fun to be around)
But here is the cool bit – by naming my faulty thinking I make them conscious and therefore I now have the ability to choose to use them or not!
What about you? Do you recognise yourself in any of the 15 styles below? Do you also recognise the often ineffective consequences of these styles in terms of your behaviour and feelings?
Styles of Faulty Thinking
1.Filtering: you take the negative and magnify them while filtering out all of the positives
2. Polarized Thinking: Things are black or white, good or bad. You have to be perfect or you’re a failure. There is no middle ground. Things are either awful or terrific. Useful for judging self or others.
3. Overgeneralization: You come to a general conclusion based on a single incident or piece of evidence. If some bad happens one, you expect it to happen over and over again. If someone lets you down once, you assume they are incompetent or can never be trusted.
4. Mind Reading: Without their saying so, you know what people are feeling and why they act the way they do, especially in terms of how they feel towards you.
5. Catastrophising: You expect disaster. You notice or head something about a problem and you assume the worst possible outcomes.
6. Personalization: You think that everything that people do or say is some kind of reaction to you. You constantly compare yourself to others.
7.Control Fallacy: If you feel externally controlled, you see yourself as a totally helpless victim of fate. You don’t believe that you can influence the important outcomes. Or conversely, you feel excessively responsible. Everything depends on you, and if things don’t go well, it is all your fault. You feel responsible for the pain and happiness of those around you. This is a huge burden.
8. Fallacy of Fairness: Fairness is a big standard. You feel resentful because you think you know what’s fair, but other people won’t agree with you. When things go wrong, you are liable to say “That’s not fair. Its just not fair”
9.Emotional Reasoning: You believe that what you feel must be true…automaticlally. If you feel stupid and boring then you MUST BE stupid and boring.
10. Fallacy of Change: You expect other people will change to suit you if you just pressure or cajole them enough. Some of your relationships are based on the premise that you can change the other person.
11. Global Labelling: You generalise one or two qualities into a negative global judgement. If you have one bad interaction with someone in a department, you will tell others that that whole department is full of idiots.
12. Blaming: You hold other people responsible for your pain or conversely, blame yourself for every problem.
13.Shoulds: You have a list of ironclad rules about how you and other people SHOULD act. People who break these rules make you angry and you feel guilty if you violate those rules. Your SHOULDS are perfectionist.
14. Being Right: You are continually on trial to prove that your opinions and actions are correct. Being wrong is unthinkable and this makes you defensive.
15. Heaven’s Reward Fallacy: You expect all your sacrifice and self denial to pay off, as if there is someone keeping score. You feel bitter when your reward does not come . Often it doesn’t and this upsets you.
(sourced from Bruce Peltier “The Psychology of Executive Coaching”)
Friday, January 8, 2010
Leadership Isn't About You
Am a big fan of Marshall Goldsmith's blogs - this one is a great reminder that "Truly great leaders recognize how silly it is to believe that a coach or a leader is the key to an organization's success. The best leaders understand that long-term results are created by all of the great people doing the work — not just the one person who has the privilege of being at the top."
Enjoy
Colm
Leadership Isn't About You
Enjoy
Colm
Leadership Isn't About You
“Who’ll be my role model? Now that my role model is gone, gone ……….”
Two random events in a space of four days has got me thinking a lot about role models.
The first, which I am not proud about, involved me arguing with my wife on a Saturday morning in front of our three kids. As I stomped out of the kitchen in my best childish huff, my wife said sarcastically “… and a fine role model you are to these boys!”
Even after peace had broken out thirty minutes later, the significance of me now being a role model to these little boys stayed with me. What kind of imprint do I want to leave with them as they grow and face the challenges of a complex world?
Three days later and as I flick around the TV channels I come across a documentary on Joan Baez. While not a fan of her music I became absorbed in the bigger story of her consistent involvement in the civil rights and the peace movement from the early 60’s to today. It was never the standard celebrity “My accountant and I think peace is a good thing.” Joan Baez marched, got arrested, was spat at and insulted because she stood up for what she believed in and because she got involved.
The impact on her record sales didn’t matter. These were her beliefs and they reflect what she continues to stand for.
That documentary left me wondering again about this idea of a role model and the questions “what do I want to stand for?”
I did think about picking someone like Mandela or Martin Luther King and saying “I want to be like them” . I even went onto a role models website - its big announcement was that it was removing Tiger Woods from his role model status. It seems even role models get rifted.
But to be honest picking someone else, famous or not, did just not sit with me. How can you try to be like someone else when it is hard enough to be fully who are you yourself?
So my new role model is going to be….me.
And that means me stepping up and proving worthy of the role. So what might that look like?
Robert Kegan and Otto Laske have separately worked on defining the main stages of adult development. With stages 1 and 2 being focused on us as kids or teenagers, the next three stages are :
Stage 3 – Socialised Mind – being highly influenced by what I believe others want to hear with constant interpreting of how I fit in and overriding my gut in order to meet others expectations.
Stage 4 – Self Authoring – being able to step back and identify and act from my own authentic value system. Taking stands and challenging the status quo based on my beliefs.
Stage 5 - Transforming – being less attached to own solutions, able to handle complexity, knowing own limit and accepting of others regardless of their view point. A Zen Buddhist state of being.
I definitely know that I start 2010 in Stage 3 – so my role model is going to hit the gym and build some stage 4 muscle this year! It is not going to be easy but then again if it was easier where would be the development?
So what is your role model signing up to in 2010?
The first, which I am not proud about, involved me arguing with my wife on a Saturday morning in front of our three kids. As I stomped out of the kitchen in my best childish huff, my wife said sarcastically “… and a fine role model you are to these boys!”
Even after peace had broken out thirty minutes later, the significance of me now being a role model to these little boys stayed with me. What kind of imprint do I want to leave with them as they grow and face the challenges of a complex world?
Three days later and as I flick around the TV channels I come across a documentary on Joan Baez. While not a fan of her music I became absorbed in the bigger story of her consistent involvement in the civil rights and the peace movement from the early 60’s to today. It was never the standard celebrity “My accountant and I think peace is a good thing.” Joan Baez marched, got arrested, was spat at and insulted because she stood up for what she believed in and because she got involved.
The impact on her record sales didn’t matter. These were her beliefs and they reflect what she continues to stand for.
That documentary left me wondering again about this idea of a role model and the questions “what do I want to stand for?”
I did think about picking someone like Mandela or Martin Luther King and saying “I want to be like them” . I even went onto a role models website - its big announcement was that it was removing Tiger Woods from his role model status. It seems even role models get rifted.
But to be honest picking someone else, famous or not, did just not sit with me. How can you try to be like someone else when it is hard enough to be fully who are you yourself?
So my new role model is going to be….me.
And that means me stepping up and proving worthy of the role. So what might that look like?
Robert Kegan and Otto Laske have separately worked on defining the main stages of adult development. With stages 1 and 2 being focused on us as kids or teenagers, the next three stages are :
Stage 3 – Socialised Mind – being highly influenced by what I believe others want to hear with constant interpreting of how I fit in and overriding my gut in order to meet others expectations.
Stage 4 – Self Authoring – being able to step back and identify and act from my own authentic value system. Taking stands and challenging the status quo based on my beliefs.
Stage 5 - Transforming – being less attached to own solutions, able to handle complexity, knowing own limit and accepting of others regardless of their view point. A Zen Buddhist state of being.
I definitely know that I start 2010 in Stage 3 – so my role model is going to hit the gym and build some stage 4 muscle this year! It is not going to be easy but then again if it was easier where would be the development?
So what is your role model signing up to in 2010?
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